So. Right. What am I doing, again?

Item – We, H and I, have our initial, Be Poked For All The Blood Tests, Endure All the Probes, Produce All The Samples consultation at the Riverside Clinic in a week’s time. This will take a good couple of hours. And then we will, possibly that very day, know if we are doing IVF in June, or if we are hopeless cases who will never have a biological child grown in this ‘ere Uterus Of Despair. So H and I are TOTAL SHUDDERING NERVOUS WRECKS OF HORRIFIC HORROR.

Item – Riverside Clinic are prepared, if we are suitable candidates, to do a cycle with us the very month we have LIT, so no worries there. *Waits for other shoe to drop with a resounding clang*

Item – I need to have a smear test. H needs to have an HIV test. I shall be going to the GP this week to organise the Pokening. I don’t know how H is organising the HIV test, or if it is being done by the LIT people, or by the Riverside Clinic, or what. I’m sure H has told me, but my brain is startlingly non-retentive at the moment. H? Did you tell me? What am I doing? Who am I and why am holding a rubber chicken?

Item – The stress of this, and the constant rows with H, and the general run-down-ness, and I am as brittle as spun glass and as irritable as a sackful of wet cats being bounced along a holly-hedge. I think, this week, I have managed to piss off every single person I know. Go me.


16 responses to “So. Right. What am I doing, again?

  • bionicbrooklynite

    Well. You can hardly expect the neighbors not to be a little peeved when you’re bouncing their cats all over the place, can you?

    Love to you this week. And double-check on H’s plan, maybe. Xoxo

    • L.

      I like all of this comment!

      Not related to BB’s comment–it just occurred to me that there should be IF treatment planners like they have wedding coordinators. Someone to make all the calls and arrangements so you’re not taxed with them, and extract information from husbands and act as a sounding board when you’re making a big decision. Except, among other niggling issues of confidentiality and such, people are already paying an arm and a leg for all the procedures and fees and so it’s not like you have extra $$$ to spend on that sort of thing. My imaginary idea quickly falls flat. Maybe a non-profit type thing, since I’m dreaming anyway!

      Best of luck to you and I hope, whatever you find out at the clinic, that you leave feeling like whatever you know is better than this state of not knowing. xoxo

  • Betttina

    So exciting! I am very happy that you have a Plan and a Goal. Much hope it all works out.

  • mfamama

    “…as irritable as a sackful of wet cats being bounced along a holly-hedge”

    That made me cackle. Break a leg (ovary?).

  • a

    I’m pretty much always that irritable. Makes you want to come and hang out with me, doesn’t it? 🙂

    Much luck on the Pokening…

  • Jenny F. Scientist, PhD

    This is one of those situations that needs an AI assistant to shout at you from your favorite mobile device, right? (I mean, without having to input all the information. Automagically.)

    Happy poking, by which I mean ick, but I hope it’s over soon. And swiftly. In a positive fashion? Maybe?

  • Betty M

    Loving the new plan in place situation. And you haven’t irritated or pissed us off yet!

  • Mina

    Better be nervous while doing than waiting. The plan sounds promising. Enticing. Despite all the proding and probing and whatnotelse is on the list.
    I was wondering about the sackful of cats though: do you let them out of the bag once in a while? Because I can only imagine the oodles of fun you might have doing that.

  • Twangy

    I wish you a very smooth and positive pokening, my dears. And much much luck with the nervous run-up. You have my absolute empathy on that. Oh, UNPRINTABLE EXPLETIVE, wait(en)ing is the worst of the worst, IM(un)HO.

  • valeryvalentina

    HIV, Syphilis, Hepatitis and I guess all the rest of them nasties, been tested for all of them, every time again for the next attempt at treatment. So very ironic to be tested for STD’s while the S had completely disappeared from my life. And then not knowing if the treatment is suitable and then the Not Knowing If It Will Work. Having a birthday in the middle of it doesn’t help.
    Don’t know what the weather is like where you are, but here it is nice and bellies are suddenly visible again, sprouting like blooming daffodils…
    Wishing with all my might that Riverside will change your luck. Quicklyest.

  • Sheila

    Whilst life does sound very tough at the moment, this does feel like a step forward nonetheless. Fingers crossed for you both.

  • Hairy Farmer Family

    Not every single person! I am still full of sympathy. And also empathy, because Marriage Is Hard, and holly hedges are sneakily everywhere.
    (I actually really do have a rubber chicken right here in the hallway if you would like to borrow it. I have acquired it through a very pedestrian route, but nevertheless, an actual Rubber Chicken, right here.)
    I am sure that the pokening will show up nothing concerning, because How Very Dare It – at this late stage? But I am feeling your nervous shuddering wreck-ness, regardless, because these are nail-gnawing times. I bestow my hugs liberally and with fervour upon you both.

  • waterbelle44

    A plan, something to hold on to. Keep on keeping on with everyone here beside you.

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