Item – I have been quiet because I have been having a real live social life, like a normal human being*. We’ve had guests staying for several days, and yesterday I went out on the town, and damn well stayed out until after midnight, turning happily into a pumpkin, with my adorable friends (I saw lots of friends! All different ones from all over!). I am now feeling flatter than Norfolk.
Item – *Respectful pause while I look dejectedly at the empty chairs around my kitchen table*
Item – My MIL is coming to stay next weekend, and the grouting in our shower is disgusting. This must be remedied. The thought of having to spend an evening remedying it is not making me feel any less deflated.
Item – About the MIL coming to stay next weekend – it’ll be the last few days of the 2ww. I don’t know whether to be grateful for the almighty distraction or flustered at the thought of attempting a private fossicking for pee-sticks while MIL knocks on the bathroom door to ask if I want coffee (Yes, she does talk to people through the bathroom door while said people are trying to pee and/or defecate in peace. This is contrary to my deepest-held beliefs. I cannot converse and *cough* relax. You talk, I clench. Is uncomfortable. So, no talky while May is communing with Nature. No. Talky. Is why bathrooms have doors. With locks. Thank you).
Item – Because, yes, I ovulated on Wednesday the 11th. Satsuma has a very strange way of paying her respects. And so, inevitably, my period is due on my birthday.
Item – Of course, H and I had been Very Affectionate And Enthusiastic in the days beforehand.
*If you knew my guests, this sentence would make you laugh until verily, your trousers exploded. Hi, guys! Love you!