Not a happy camper

Another 11 day luteal phase. Bugger. Bugger bugger bugger bugger bugger.

In less than two weeks I have a ‘well, now, anything to add?’ appointment at my old NHS fertility clinic, which I wondered at the point of, given that back in the summer said clinic and I seemed to be washing our hands of each other. And here is the point. My luteal phase is shortening again, Satsuma’s on an erratic bender, and I get far too many weird and inexplicable pains and cramps and such-like in the lead-up to ovulation and I don’t like it. But I do have a strong suspicion that Miss Consultant, or her minion, depending on who I see, will shrug. And then we will try to stare each other down, like cats on a high fence. And the person with the medical degrees will probably win, and I will turn tail and shuffle off home in a temper.

Meanwhile, inevitably, OW.


15 responses to “Not a happy camper

  • Nina

    May, I need to teach you how to be bitchily American, instead of politely British. Should said minion (and they’re all minions if they don’t have MD behind their name in the US) shrug, this would be an in-excusable example of bad form requiring much fit throwing and pissed-offedness. You tell her where she can stick her shrug, and to get off her fat ass and do something about your problem, such as refer you to a specialist immediately, or else you will be reporting her to her superiors, and it won’t be glowing. You will detail each and every time you’ve had to correct them about pertinent information mid appointment, each time you’ve had to deal with missing lab work/paperwork, and each time you’ve been shrugged off and treated like you were un-important or silly or anything but deadly serious and in need of help. Write it all down if you have to, so you don’t miss anything. It should take up several sheets of paper front and back. You don’t deserve this, and you must stand up for yourself in all your hormonal glory. It will likely scare them, and get better results, if nothing better than a referral to get you away from that pitiful excuse for medical provision. Rant over. Love you, sweetheart.

  • Betty M

    Uggh encored. Miss Consultant needs to come up with something. You can’t keep going back and forth to just shrugs. We can come and start a demo outside to persuade her if necessary….there wer a bunch of all purpose angry signs abandoned outside LSE as I walked past the other day.

  • Susan

    I hear you! This all stinks. Sigh.

  • twangy

    Oh May. I can only hope this cycle has been a cyst-induced aberration. Is that possible?

    So sorry you’re in pain, again. It’s horrible.

  • thalia

    Gutted. I am so sorry you are going through this again.

    May I say, you really need to get prepared now for that meeting with miss consultant. Get a list of things you want to talk about. If you’ve got her email address (and you can probably find it online if you look for one of her publications), then send the list in advance. And screw up your courage to the sticking point. This is your meeting, make the most of it.

  • Nina

    You wanna take your laptop and make up a time for us all to log on and help? I can scare people from an ocean away. I’ve done it before!

  • Korechronicles

    I’m happy to join the virtual scaring team. Anything to get a decent outcome from your next meeting with Miss Consultant.

    Love to you.

  • QoB

    I agree with Nina.
    Bring your bolshiest, most stubborn and assertive friend/relative. If you can’t, channel them.

  • Hairy Farmer Wifey

    *disclaimer* I have just accidentally deleted a long comment and I am officially Moody. Mmphf!

    No-one views a dithering, bumbling medico through narrower eyes than I, but I’m grimly certain that axe-waving and expostulation is unlikely to produce anything startling in terms of New Ideas, Results or general Pulling-Out-Of-Finger, because there simply aren’t any major new avenues to travel down, and that’s likely why May isn’t sounding hopeful.

    This is the rub, you see. The preferred solution to adenomyosis and eye-watering period pain generally involves hysterectomy or chemical sterility. The preferred solution to buggered cycle lengths and lazy ovaries often involves Clomid, and the Category section over on the right says why That Would Likely Be Bad For May – although I grant you Satsuma needs a proper, hard kick up the arse, because she has been a Bad Girl of late.

    And… If May wasn’t GETTING pregnant, Ms Consultant could be all busy and IVF-y about MAKING May pregnant, but she’s as stupendously fecund as all the rest of her tribe, and they are doing rather better, conceptually, than the average couple, and all by themselves, too. The clotting disorder is identified and drug prescriptions are waiting in the wings ready, so there’s nowt for Ms Consultant to do there. Hence, there is indeed an enormous amount of genuine potential for shoulder-shrugging, and advising to Watch&Wait, and no real blame to the woman, because May’s chances of a successful solo pregnancy, on paper, are very good.

    However, all that being said… bugger paper chances. This is *May* we are talking about, and never was there a more deserving recipient of a bit of placard-waving or fist-thumping-on-desk action.


    May, darling, would it be worth having a chat to Ms Consultant – and correct me if you’ve spoken to her about this before – about a few monitored cycles? I see it (through my -3.75 eyes, mind you), as a choice between A) submitting grimly to the organic vaguaries of Satsuma’s behaviour, shagging like rabbits at every opportunity, and hoping she doesn’t pull another 60+ dayer, B) downregulate the misbehaving, fake-outing little bugger into a chemical stupor and inject gonadotrophins instead, or C) take regular looks inside to see what is actually going on.

    Satsuma is driving you mad with A). Your pregnancy stats (You have enough data for stats, which is unspeakably miserable, and worthy of more commiseration than a bloody parenthesis) are sufficiently encouraging to hold off on B). I appreciate the backing and forthing involved in the scanning for C) is dreary, but… I dunno. I can’t somehow visualise Satsuma, given what I know of the little fruit, being knocked into conformist follicular or luteal shape by any drug in Ms C’s pharmacopeia, short of the Big IVF Guns. Satsuma is feisty, and needs watching suspiciously.

    Perhaps, after all, Ms C will have clever ideas and clever drugs about which I know nothing. Perhaps she will indeed Cat-Stare you into A) and send you home. Perhaps she will offer B), and possibly C). Or she may just ask, as my consultant eventually did: where do we go from here? What treatment do you want from me?

    If she, hypothetically, DID ask that… if the path forward with your treatment was foggy enough to her that she would happily throw the ball back to you – what would you say to her? What treatment, if any, would you order for yourself? If you have a clear idea of exactly what support you want from her clinic, then I think your chances of utter frustration in a fortnight are… less. Not obviated, because this is the lovely NHS, after all, but… less.

    *scrolls up*
    My. I appear to have… gone on a bit.
    Ummm. Sorry ’bout that.

    Lovey, you’re probably curled on the bathroom floor just at the moment. I know you’re hurting horribly, and I know it sucks hairy balls, and I don’t know what else to say, except that I wish this wasn’t happening to you, because it isn’t bloody fair, and I am really, really, really sodding cross about it. So there.

    • Laurel

      Well, of course I’m not May but *I* found that a really helpful and interesting comment, so I hope that when she is feeling better, she does, too. I particularly like that bit about “what treatment would you order for yourself” because I have had a lot of doctors (not in this particular realm, just generally) essentially ask me the same. More often than not, really.

      Wishing you all the best, May, as always.

  • Lulu

    Booo to 11 day luteal phases. Just found you through the stirrup queen’s blog roll and wanted to say hi. I also have PCOS. Good luck with everything!!!

  • wombattwo

    Have been disconnected from humanity for the last week, what with moving countries and the like… I’m sorry that Satsuma is such a badly-behaved little madam.
    Think it’s definitely worth insisting on seeing Miss Consultant – whether you see her initially or ask her minion to fetch her, as I suspect that she is the only one who may have anything helpful to add, as your reproductive system is not straightforward, unfortunately.
    It’s also probably a good plan to have an idea of what you want, and to go armed with a list of questions/suggestions/theories to discuss with her.
    And if the whole thing is making you tired, exhausted, miserable and fed up (as I suspect anyone would be) then I send you hugs (well, I do anyway, even if you’re not fed up!) and cups of tea, and gin, and ice cream, and a gentle hand-holding, and all my wishes that things turn a corner for you soon, and you get to be the amazing mum you should be.

  • What she said « Nuts in May

    […] did love all your comments on my last post, threatening international mayhem and possible slaying if my clinic doesn’t produce something […]

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