I must keep track

Item – I have given myself a shake, and removed myself from Elsewhere until I can get a grip and stop being such a big girl’s blouse. As for the drama, we now draw a veil over it and a line under it.

Item – Meanwhile! Plans for Minx’s birthday have been more-or-less finalised, and tomorrow we’ll be in town doing things that precocious seven-year-olds like doing. Seven years ago, I held all eight pounds of her in my arms, and longing for a child of my own came over me like a barrel wave (and then I proposed to H, and then we got married and then I got a proper job and then I stopped taking the pill, which all took nearly two years, but Minx started it (and by extension, this blog. Like I said, precocious)).

Item – I still haven’t ovulated. Yes! I know! It’s fucking ridiculous! Day 60! 60! And as I type, Satsuma recovering from another fake-out, having made rather a fuss on Thursday and Friday, and for what, eh? What? However, I have a day off next week, and I am going to spend some of that day off at the GP’s, getting a prescription for provera, and then I will have that ovary spanked for a week solid, and once she is beaten into quiescent submission, we can have another try at coordinating the progesterone dips, bleed, oestrogen rises, taking LH and FSH with it, surge, *pop*, and result! sequence correctly. Satsuma has three more days to get it together. Three. More. Days. And then I give up on her.

Item – As for the recurrent episodes of ovarian pain, with occasional bonus spotting or light bleeding just in case we all thought this blog needed MOAR DRAMAS, and which please me not in the slightest, well, we still have the ‘if you insist, in case of emergencies’ appointment with the ACU at HOITC in November [I thought we were done with the ACU? – ed.]. When the letter confirming said appointment arrived in the post, we noticed at once it wasn’t for a scan, as promised by the Pregnant Minion of Miss Consultant, but for a chat with Miss Consultant, the which bait-and-switch is so NHS. Which is possibly all to the good, as she after all is the one person who has seen my insides from the inside, and might have some idea as to my chances of having a functional cyst/endometrioma/piranha on my ovary and what if anything can be done about it. And/or a prescription for more provera in case of need. (If she suggests Clomid again I will run screaming through the wards wrapped in nothing but her consulting-room curtains).

Item – I haven’t lost any weight at all since H and I went on holiday (on the other hand, I haven’t put any on either. Let us not lament or tear our hair unnecessarily). If we are going to see Miss Consultant again, I want to be so very obviously thinner than I was when she last saw me (I’m already about ten pounds lighter – ha!) that she will find herself stunned into absolute silence on the subject of my avoirdupois, and we can get onto discussing things useful and productive.

Item – *has graceless and panicky ‘I’m 35! I don’t have time to be anovulatory!’ fit*

Item – A kind and thoughtful commentator suggested I reconsider IVF, to increase my chances of getting pregnant (we all know staying it is a crap-shoot). Eh. I am given to understand that the chances of IVF succeeding, given my age, weight, PCOS, and RPL, are about 14% to 30% per cycle. Given my ‘getting pregnant while banging my husband’ chances are about the same, and banging my husband costs very little and doesn’t cause OHSS (which I am at massively increased risk for, given mono-ovary of cystic excess), I’m not comfortable with IVF at the moment. If Satsuma keeps up her nonsense, I shall no doubt change my mind sharpish (and if she gets OHSS at that point, serve the silly bitch right).

Item – I had a migraine on Friday afternoon. Oh, no reason for telling you. Just whining. Migraine! Owies! Thank you!


17 responses to “I must keep track

  • wombattwo

    Dear Satsuma,
    Piranhas do not make good pets. Kindly flush said piranha down the toilet immediately before it eats you.
    That is all.

    And May, I realise I know little about IVF, so feel free to contradict/ignore me on this point, but isn’t there more chance of getting a genetically decent, properly dividing embryo seeing as they’re the ones they transfer, and so perhaps slightly more chance of at least diminishing that reason for miscarriage? Like I said, feel free to ignore.

    • May

      I shan’t ignore. It’s a good point. If I have another miscarriage despite being on blood-thinners it’s a point that will be made with great force to The Professor and/or whichever NHS clinic is still putting up with me. At the moment, however, because both H and I have been karyotyped and are both normal, the professional thinking seems to be that the main issue is my sticky blood rather than genetic mince.

      Fingers crossed.

  • a

    I hope Miss Consultant has something useful to offer. NHS would make me crazy. But then, it doesn’t take much.

    Glad to hear that you are stepping away from the drama machine. Sorry to hear about the migraine and the misbehaving Satsuma.

    I hope you really enjoy Minx’s birthday!

  • twangy

    Blooming Nora, that Satsuma. How completely and utterly maddening, when she’d been so regular for ages. Thank medical science for a secret weapon in the shape of provera – though tis hardly straightforward. What would be really GOOD, would be if she’d just get on with it.

    On a lighter note, (groan-sorry). 10 pounds! That’s great!
    In yer face Miss Consultant!

    Migraine – very very ow, indeed. Much sympathy.

  • Mary

    Hehee that was me 🙂
    The guest connector is correct in that they select the best embryos genetically during IVF/ICSI but also, which I thought very appropriate for you, they give you a nice cocktail of drugs and hormones to make sure you stay pregnant.
    Whatever you do I wish you all the success in the world!!!

  • Mary

    Should have said “first commentor”

  • Betty M

    Bloody Satsuma this is no time to play coy. Hope Minx’s extravaganza went well and you haven’t drowned in a surfeit of pink and sugar.

    • Betty M

      Oh and a break from Elsewhere sounds just the ticket. Ther is some weird Internet madness that infects every site every so often. Stepping back until it calms down is an excellent policy.

  • Hairy Farmer Family

    Piranha! Now THERE’S a diagnosis I hadn’t considered! must see if I can work that one into my own personal Theory Of Gynaecology.

    *narrows eyes* (I have one-and-one-half working ones currently: we’re good.)
    *crooks one finger at Satsuma*
    *points wordlessly toward the cells*
    *follows her in and slams the door*

  • katie

    Mary, I’m really sorry to say but all the medical evidence is that embryo selection DOES NOT WORK for the likes of me and May. In fact some studies show higher rates of miscarriage (and no lower with IVF in general, either).

    I’ve also had several people suggest IVF but as you know we had pretty much the same history as you, just rather more elderly and therefore more rushed.

  • Mary

    Well I’ll stay out of this all then. I just found there was a distinct difference between pregnancy support using drugs and hormones after IVF versus IUI which I’ve done a dozen times. I don’t know if HFF comment implies that my comment was hurtful or poorly worded, but it’s a similar phrase to what my clinic used during the IVF process, that they are more aggressive in treating you post IVF to help you stay pregnant. No offense was intended and no need to reply as I am removing this from my reader. Good luck to all trying for the dream of a family.

  • katie

    I think what just happened is I tried to introduce an element of debate (or possibly facts). But not to worry, when the papers on the lack of success for embryo selection came out, a very very large number of people in the IF world went LA LA LA I HAVE MY FINGERS IN MY EARS I CAN’T HEAR YOU LA LA LA.

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