Going cold turkey for (Canadian) Thanksgiving

In a desperate attempt to exercise some feeble illusion of control over the sweeping forces of destiny, I have decided to treat myself like a marble temple swept out, garnished and perfumed by acolytes for this two week wait. I am not taking any kind of NSAID (I did crack and take a few paracetamol for I have a nasty cold, thank you, but I think they’re Allowed. Paracetamol, that is. I doubt colds are). And, get this, this is really important, I have given up coffee.

Yes, I know. Coffee. And me the Coffee-Queen of South-East London.

I normally only drink one cup a day (and one or two cups of tea), so I was cheerfully trundling through life in a caffeinated way, ignoring all the ‘coffee-drinkers are dooming their embryos’ bollocks pouring through the media (this is the BBC’s moderate, sensible take on it all). Seriously, there was no way I was drinking 300 mg of coffee. No way. Not my problem.

Um. Then I actually had a little think about the actual coffee quantities I’ve actually been drinking for the past couple *cough* of months, and, err, and, well, I’m giving up coffee for the 2ww. Oh, I know caffeine merely raises a insert-random-percentage-because-I-swear-doctors-make-this-shit-up (allegedly) risk to a slightly-bigger risk, but, you know, I can control my caffeine intake. I can’t control any other crapola going on, I can’t make H’s sperm get all the way up to the fallopian tube in fighting trim, I can’t make the damn egg talk to any of them, I can’t make the egg genetically magnificent, nor can I weed out any genetic slackers H has provided, I can’t get any given zygote bloody well divide and keep dividing and implant and talk chorionic talk. But by heck I can make that endometrium veerrrrry sliiiiightly less toxic.

By ‘eck, it’s making me tetchy, though.


10 responses to “Going cold turkey for (Canadian) Thanksgiving

  • megan

    it gets better after a few days. i was like bambi in the headlights when i first quit…. how stupid my caffiene withdrawl made me made it easier. i figured if it impacted me THAT much that it couldn’t be good for me. good luck, miss may! xo

  • Jane G

    My caffeine addiction used to be tea. I wasn’t even a massive consumer, only two or three cups a day. But OMG the headaches I got when I gave it up. Ouch! I mostly stick to herbal or fruit teas now, but occasionally I have to break out and have a cappuchino, as I live in a town with exceedingly good coffee shops.

    Good luck for this 2ww!

  • a

    I just get a headache for a day or so. But, I did quit smoking 10 years ago, and that will certainly make a person a bit tetchy, so I can understand how you feel. Good luck, and more importantly, good luck to H!

  • Womb For Improvement

    I’ve never drunk coffee, but love tea. The last cuppa I had was in July and I still miss it. Time to put on the kettle for a spot of red bush …

  • Minawolf

    I’m a horrible mother because though I did give up my daily coffee (I do decaf and pscyhe myself out), I do indulge in diet mountain dew once or twice a week.

  • twangy

    I love the BBC. So Keep Calm and Carry On-ish.

    Good luck with kicking the habit. I note with alarm that hot chocolate is As Bad.

    Heart sinking…

  • Korechronicles

    I was forced into immediate caffeine withdrawal when I returned to full time work and developed full time migraines along with it. Because my coffee intake went from occasional cappuccino to three or four a day. Well, there WERE seventeen brilliant coffee shops within a five minute walk.

    In denial initially and tried (a) drinking less before (b) switching to decaf. It’s now been 10 years, 6 months, 5 days and 9 hours since my last cup. And I still miss it.

    I did not have the motivation that you do, so hang tough, dear May. I’m here with the ra-ra skirt and pom-poms. And totally caffeine free.

  • Bexx

    I totally sympathise, I gave up coffee this month too. Initially, I tried herbal teas instead, but they taste so damn yucky. Smell great, but taste poo. Plus they’re just no good for getting one out of zombie mode first thing in the morning.

    I’ve never liked regular tea (apparently I pull some great faces when forced to consume some) but decided to give it another go and bought a multipack of Twinings specialty teas. Discovered I actually quite like Earl Grey.

    I also bought some Redbush Earl Grey, which isn’t quite as nice, but still OK. So I make myself one caffeinated Earl Grey in the morning and settle for Redbush the rest of the day.

  • Betty M

    I confess I have never given it up entirely. Life too bloody short in my opinion. Cut down to one a day in pregnancy though. The one cycle I did cut it out was a bust in any event so I was dubious on the effect. Interestingly one of the OBs mentioned in the BBC article was my OB – didn’t mention it to me mind…..

  • Hairy Farmer Family

    You know, I thought of you over the weekend, because I was stood outside in the chill for 7 hours a day and drank a silly, stupid, foolish amount of coffee to keep myself warm. I began by pitying your caffeine withdrawal, but ended with grouchy gut-ache and wishing I’d joined you in your abstemiousness.

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