Red Menace versus the Chalet of Terror (with extras)

Item – Yeah, well, this cycle blew chunks. Hello cramps, hello blood. Come along for the ride, why don’t you. So, no, I am not going to come back ‘pregnate’ from vay-cayyyy-tion, urban myth be damned, screwed, buggered and dismembered.

Item – We catch a flight to the Alps tomorrow morning (‘ray). We have Swiss Francs (‘ray). We have new toothbrushes. (‘ray). My mother has called, emailed and texted us nine hundred and forty three times to check our flight-times (boo). As has FIL, who is not meeting us at the airport, or even arriving at all until a few days after we do (grr). I have packed my clothes (‘ray). I have packed all my ugliest black knickers and enough sanitary towels to make a double bed out of in a crisis (boo). I am having a weight-limit-of-luggage book-to-take emergency (boo). H is enduring said emergency with wry amusement (harrumph).

Item – We are going for a week. Can you live without me for a week? Of course you can. You’ve all got lives and everything.

Item – After much hanging about waiting to hear back from the Open University re: creative writing course, and a fair bit of phoning them and leaving messages and saying ‘bah!’ a lot, in between panicking that now, oh, now, that I finally have the courage to do it, it’ll all go tits up, I actually did speak to a human being this evening, who is my new best friend, and all is sorted and I am totally registered and doing the course starting next month *hyperventilates, falls over*.

Item – Just to make sure today did not contain so much as one electron of relaxation, I also had my annual PDR (Personal Development Review) this afternoon. Even though I think it went pretty well, and even though Alpha Boss was nice as pie through-out, and even though she hadn’t a single criticism to make, I was bricking myself. And now I can’t have a drink, as alcohol plus mefenamic acid plus tranexamic acid = holes burnt right through the stomach lining. Allegedly.

Item – Yes, I decided to take my drugs this cycle, despite the shock discovery that mefenamic acid and, in fact, most strong NSAIDS are implicated in ovulation problems, as well as being maybe, possibly, teratogenic (I knew that bit. I don’t touch anything stronger than paracetamol and pre-natal vitamins after ovulation. I’m so good). Agh. On the other hand, vomiting, fainting, and bleeding all over an aeroplane, or train-carriage, or God forbid a Swiss hotel room, not acceptable. But I shall be going back to Doc Tashless and berating him on return to these shores. Be-RATE-ing him. Because, seriously, does he know NSAIDS possibly inhibit ovulation? If he does, can I hit him with a chair? Do I have any alternatives to sterilising agents of death? Are they only an issue around ovulation and/or the two week wait? Why won’t Google tell me?

Item – I overthink everything, don’t I?


10 responses to “Red Menace versus the Chalet of Terror (with extras)

  • a

    Have a wonderful trip to the Chalet of Terror!

  • Womb For Improvement

    Creative writing course sounds great. Hardwork, but great.

  • Jane G

    Have a lovely holiday, and good luck with the writing course.

  • twangy

    Writing course is fab idea. Good on you.
    NSAIDs sound terrible, like a nuclear weapon, but what is a girl to do? Very tricky, if not impossible to cover all bases. Dr Tashless must think of something better and let him be lively about it.

    Got my extremities crossed for you. Have fun, despite all.

  • Secret D

    Have a good trip. Hope the in-laws don’t drive you insane!

  • thalia

    I think given the kinds of periods you have, you need the drugs. Those data are designed to be upsetting. What they usually say is that the risk of x is raised from [microscopically small] to [one iota more than microscopically small] so drug yourself as you like.

    hang in there.

  • MsPrufrock

    Man, Thalia’s good, isn’t she?

    I hope you enjoy your time away despite the circumstances. Also – creative writing course…EXCITING!

  • Korechronicles

    Good luck with the visit to the Chalet of Terror. I will be thinking of you both and perhaps, if things get too unbearable, you can (mentally) escape and join us at the Town House of Mildly Disturbing where the sky is stunningly blue and the pool incredibly close. And a bottle of chilled wine is always ready to go.

    And Go May! on the creative writing course. I am waiting to read your homework.

  • Betty M

    Hope that the Chalet of Terror is proving to be less terrifying than expected. I am envious of all that lovely fresh Swiss butter and great bread etc. Not envious of beng with annoying relatives.

    Sod the NSAIDs issues. Needs must sometime.

  • Hairy Farmer Family

    I’ve been thinking about the phrase ‘damned, screwed, buggered and dismembered’ all week. I think it’s my new favourite.

    Can’t wait to hear your holiday news.

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