It’s that hope again. ‘Eave ‘alf a brick at ‘er

OK. I definitely ovulated on Sunday. Everyone and everything agrees. Even the charting software.

We had quite a lot of really rather well-timed sex this month, as H reacted to my Great Big Public Freak-Out by *ahem* rising to the occasion. Bless him. I should bellow and humiliate him public more often.

Kidding!

Sweetheart? I said I was kidding. You can come back now. Sweetheart?

Anyway. I was discussing budgets with a colleague, and thence how long it’d be until the new Academic year and the new budget, and I thought to myself, ooh, nine months! That means… AUGH! And hope had bitten me on the arse again.

Fuck. I was being all cool and cynical and treating this as a cycle that had to be got out of the way before we could do the next three Clomid goes and try ovulating before my period would be due were I normal. This? This is just a rehearsal. Not actually a cycle. No. Especially what with NO FREAKING CONTACT WITH MISS BUSY-PANTS CONSULTANT WHO IS CLEARLY TOO FREAKING WONDERFUL TO TALK TO HER FREAKING PATIENTS. (*cough* – sorry about that).

Anyway. The cool blase attitude. Scuppered. Not cool about this at all. Will be menstruating over Christmas in a state of abject pissed-offness. And DRINKING.

Fuck.

But I’m still taking the expensive pre-natal vitamins until proven useless.

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5 responses to “It’s that hope again. ‘Eave ‘alf a brick at ‘er

  • Korechronicles

    It was someone much, much smarter than me who said that the natural flight of the human mind is not from pleasure to pleasure but from hope to hope. Sounds like you’ve got a bit of both of those things going on. Also letting my mind, when I can find it, fly out into the hope-a-sphere to keep you company.

  • keanetwins

    Best of British darlin’ 🙂

    Oh, and my satsuma equivalents are currently dicking about (ironically good use of swear word so shall leave. APologies for rudeness), with thinking about ovum action after any reasonable woman would already be menstruating.

    Le sigh.

    In a week I’ll have a torrential anovulatory bleed again I spect.

    J

  • Aphra

    Looks like you need smiles and soap next, Dear heart. Just avoid railway shares.

    *hug*

    A/B

  • Jane G

    It appears we have synchronised, as I ovulated on Sunday too. And I am totally obsessing about it, since it’s our first proper two week wait since Oct 07.

    It’s head wrecking, isn’t it?

  • womb for improvement

    Self-protect mode? I hope (there it is again) you won’t have a bloody Christmas.

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